Forget Self Care, Try Self Parenting

Truth is, when left to my own devices, I tend to go off-the-charts feral.

My sleep schedule becomes erratic (or non-existent), my screen time skyrockets, my meals become… well… odd (read: leftover Pad Thai and stale Lorna Doone cookies for breakfast).

Long story short, I am the oldest of 6 kids, and growing up there was always always something to be done for someone else. If a meal was being made, it was for at least 4+ people. If laundry was being done, chances are it wasn’t just for one person’s clothes. I think this way of growing up lent itself to living with others beautifully, helping out and working in a group- but honestly it can leave you in a bit of a weird space when you find yourself… by yourself.

My usual strategy for breaking out of unhealthy patterns (cookies for breakfast and staying up til 4:00am watching The Crown) is usually by inviting a friend over so that I’m forced to change out of my sweats (in which I have been living) and move the collection of bras from the back of my couch to the back of my closet.

However, since moving back across the country, my self-care choices have plummeted hard, along with my social engagements.

Anyway, I digress.

A few weeks ago, on a Zoom call with a friend (since life has been basically relegated to those, these days) we started talking about the fantasy of self-care, and my constant desire to be better about how I treat myself. She started describing a new approach…